Monday, October 24, 2005

My Adventure of Being Weird

The Diva tagged me with this 5 weirdo list thingy in my own comment box, the cheek! Oh well, here goes.

#1. I still have my bantal busuk. I have been using the services of one since I was a toddler. They’re usually get thrown away by my mum/grannie, but safe to say, a replacement is close at hand every time.

#2. I’d like to scratch my ermm.. testicular region. They get very itchy a lot la. Don’t yours?

#3. I snore when I’m exhausted, a very throaty, gurgled, snoring sound. It is not a pretty sight to see nor a pretty sound to hear.

#4. I like to talk to myself, or more to the point, think aloud. This has resulted in people thinking that I am a bit of a loony.

#5. I like to daydream. I used to daydream a lot. Being an only child for the first 11 years, and having a shit-load of toys to myself, I had to make believe a lot of things. I didn’t suffer to the extent of having any imaginary friends, though.

Now, the if you’ll excuse me, the angry voice on my head is telling me to clean my shotgun again.

Thursday, October 20, 2005

My Adventure of (Not) Getting Tagged

This is another meme that’s been circulating every-bloody-where. I have yet to be tagged on this but thought I have a bit of laugh of identifying the books which I’ve picked up over the years. Disregarding the current rules of having to print back the entire bloody collection, (last count was 470) I have taken the liberty of displaying ONLY the ones I’ve read.

001. The Lord of the Rings, JRR Tolkien
005. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, JK Rowling
007. Winnie the Pooh, AA Milne
009. The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, CS Lewis
016. The Wind in the Willows, Kenneth Grahame
022. Harry Potter And The Sorcerer's Stone, JK Rowling
023. Harry Potter And The Chamber Of Secrets, JK Rowling
024. Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban, JK Rowling
025. The Hobbit, JRR Tolkien
034. David Copperfield, Charles Dickens
035. Charlie And The Chocolate Factory, Roald Dahl
036. Treasure Island, Robert Louis Stevenson
039. Dune, Frank Herbert
042. Watership Down, Richard Adams0
51. The Secret Garden, Frances Hodgson Burnett0
53. The Stand, Stephen King
056. The BFG, Roald Dahl
074. Matilda, Roald Dahl
089. Magician, Raymond E Feist
119. Shogun, James Clavell
128. The Hound Of The Baskervilles, Arthur Conan Doyle
132. Danny The Champion Of The World, Roald Dahl
141. All Quiet On The Western Front, Erich Maria Remarque
145. James And The Giant Peach, Roald Dahl
169. The Witches, Roald Dahl
170. Charlotte's Web, E. B. White
173. The Old Man And The Sea, Ernest Hemingway
313. The Art of War, Sun Tzu
340. Paradise Lost, John Milton
369. Ivanhoe, Walter Scott
428. Mein Kampf, Adolf Hitler

31 books out of 470. That’s about 6%. Shite. Well, still it’s a decent list.

My Adventure of Getting Tagged

I’ve been tagged thrice with this “7” meme. 3 times a bloody charm now innit? Babe whacked me with my third. Well, since she was nice in being my first volunteer to chase the ‘pemburu2 haram’ and whack their pancreas’, how could I refuse. So, here goes.

Seven things to do before I die :
- lose these damn spares, and get a bloody six pack
- scuba dive off the bahamas/maldives/great barrier reef
- catch & secure my first King Cobra
- milk a poisonous snake
- discover a new species of wildlife, and have it be scientifcally named after me
- master the guitar
- get married, have kids and hopefully grandchildren.

Seven things I just-can't-do :
- sleep late, wake-up early. really not a morning person
- get rid of these pimple scars on me face
- grow taller
- slam dunk
- quit smoking
- have long hair
- correct my eyesight with laser surgery.

Seven celebrity crushes :
- maya karin
- marion caunter
- annahita balkavoli
- coco lee
- jessica alba
- lacey chabert
- hillary duff

Seven often used phrases/words :
- the f-word ( a lot)
- rilek la
- pundeks
- siot la
- technically..
- basically..
- shite

Seven things that attract me to the opposite sex :
- Cute/adorable features
- Nice rack
- Perky buns
- Nice rack
- Nice hair
- Great cook
- Nice rack

Friday, October 14, 2005

Your Adventure in Searching for A Lost Rhino

Kehadapan Pemburu2 Haram,

Warkah ini ditulis adalah untuk memohon kepada Persatuan Pemburu2 Haram Asia Tenggara untuk mendapatkan perkerjaan yang lebih afdal dan berfaedah. Sekian lama pihak tuan telah memburu kehidupan liar di rantau ini sehingga terancam sesetengah populasi haiwan.

Sifat tamak haloba pihak tuan telah meyebabkan banyak hidupan liar di rantau ini menjadi mangsa nafsu rakus yang tidak mengenal belas-kasihan. Diantara haiwan terancam yang menjadi sasaran pihak tuan adalah merupakan Badak Sumbu Malaya. Populasi haiwan tersebut semakin hari semakin sedikit dan ada kemungkinan ia akan pupus dari muka bumi ini.

Sedihnya, haiwan tersebut diburu dan dibunuh semata-mata untuk mengambil bahagian2 badan yang tertentu, yang diakatakan mempunyai 'medicinal properties' dan juga 'aphrodisiac'.

Dukacita dimaklumkan, kepada tuan, kajian saintifik tidak pernah membuktikan kesasihan teori di atas. Di samping itu, terdapat banyak pharmacy di kota dan di desa yang menjual vitamin serta supplement.

Kelemehan tuan di ranjang mungkin disebabkan oleh isteri2 tuan yang hodoh ataupun kemaluan yang kecil. Tanduk haiwan tersebut tidak akan membantu masalah yang dialami tuan.

Oleh itu, saya mengesyorkan tuan dengan segala hormatnya menghantukkan kepala di gerigi cermin rumah ataupun menseterikakan telinga rakan tuan sampai dia menangis.

Akhir sekali, tuan dinasihatkan berdoa kepada tuhan supaya tidak berjumpa atau terserempak dengan saya. Saya akan mengerjakan organ pankreas tuan secukupnya.

Terima kasih,

Yang menjalankan tugas,

Mimi Buruk Tuan

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

My Adventure of Becoming A Year Older

9th October came and went. It’s appearance was as fleet as a warm gust blowing in the chilly October sky. It’s departure, sudden and unnerving. There were no allowance for celebration, only well-wishing. Since the day itself coincided with Ramadhan, the only joyous partaking of food and drink had to wait until the muezzin’s call for Maghrib prayers.

28 years old. It’s been a long road getting here, but even a longer one waits. Insyaallah.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

My Adventure of Discovering A Phobia

I hate Fire Centipedes. I hate them. Hate, hate, hate, hate.

Most of you will probably be laughing at the idea. Mr. Nocturnal Excursions himself, afraid of a small, innocent centipede?

Small and innocent my arse! Fire Centipedes or Lipan Bara is a huge, red, many- limbed freak of nature. The two (yes two!) that I saw last night was at least 30 cms long, with the tail armed with a 1 cm-long double sting.

Your common garden centipede, the ulat gonggok, I have no problem with. But the lipan bara is another story. There I was in Sg. Penchala, surveying potential Frogging sites and suddenly from under a rock they both came out, crawling towards me like some mutant nightmare creature.

So I did what any other entomologically adverse person would do. I legged it, whilst screaming obscenities at the both of them.

My (Mis)Adventure of Seeing Liverpool Get Torn Apart

Jose: You muppet Raf, give us this match at Anfield and we’ll bloody let you win at the Bridge next time. We can sort out that annoying Frenchmen at Highbury for you was well.

Rafa: Sort out that smelly Manc Scotsman on top of it, and you have yourself a deal, mate.

Jose: Ok, 4 goals ya? Here’s an ownership of a diamond mind in central Ukraine, courtesy of Mr. Abrahamovich. You can go and buy that Adriano lad or something. You really have to get rid of that number 9 of yours now innit? Bloody hell mate, he’s rubbish.

Wouldn't it be nice of the above-said conversation did take place. The reality is that Liverpool got suckered into Chelsea's gameplan. We should have "parked the team bus in front of goal" from the start, then hit them on the counter-attack.

4-1. Shite. Not a good start to my week.