Friday, January 20, 2006

My Adventure of (Not) Getting Tagged II



With regards to a lack of any current conservation issues in the country, a sudden decline of nocturnal excursions into the wild as well as a non-occurrence of situations or entities annoying the shite out of me, I find myself facing a writer’s block.

Thus, I have opted to tag my own self with this new meme which is currenly making its way around. It is a meme which, Sarclover, Angel Eyes and Desparil have participated (or tried to) and was duly criticised unmercilessly by yours truly.

So now comes the time when I put my money where my mouth is, rather than wait to have to remove the insipid shoe from it.

The rules are as below:

#1. Write an entry of between 100-200 words, with these words have to be included once, and only once:
I, me, blowjob, grapes, random, power, loneliness, water, robot, blue
#2. Out of the 10 words, you can only change 2 words.
#3. Your essay must make some kind of sense.

I grasped the hilt of my sabre tightly as my eyes scanned the battlefield. The outlying land was filled with ranks of orcs, ogres and trolls. They were amassing for one final push against my already thin defensive line.

Behind me stood my Knights. Once they were 5 companies strong. Now, only 1 company remain, decimated by the last skirmish.

We kept our shields up and at ready. Many a times an Orc would loosen an arrow at random. It is counted ill-luck to be struck down in such a way.

It seemed that our numbers, as compared to the might and power of the Black Tower was overwhelming. Yet, we will not allow ourselves to be slaughtered. For each of us knew we carried the fate of the goodly folks of Middle Earth in our hands. We were our land’s last defence. One last defiance against the forces of Mordor.

This burden we accepted and not even the loneliness of a long and hard war, or even the days without food or water, could put a dent on our morale.

All of a sudden a garrish sound of Black Horns sounded across the enemy the ranks, followed by the rumbling ground as the Dark Army charged.

I lifted my sabre high. My Knights responded by forming a defensive file, sword and shield ready in a fighting stance, awaiting their incoming doom.

Immediately, the blue sky were filled with Elven arrows, as our allies from Lothlorien unleashed a volley of fletched death. Hundreds of the enemy fell, but still they came.

I waited till the last minute before shouting the order for a counter-charge. With a cry of ‘Elendil!', I brought my weapon against the shield of the closest Orc.

All around me, the battle was met. The ringing clash of steel echoed aloud as the Knights of Gondor met the hordes of the Black City, in this last great battle of our time.’

Note #1. I changed ‘Blowjob’ to ‘Skirmish’ and ‘Robot’ to ‘Morale’.

Note #2. You lot can, at your own convenience, bow down at my feet whilst exclaiming, “We are not worthy!” in a repetitive motion in honor of my creative literary brilliance.

Note#3. Words in bold complies with the 100-200 words rule. It can stand on its own but severely lacks the punch needed. That’s where the un-bolded words come in.
Me so clever. :p

Note#4. Do you have any idea how hard it is to refrain from using the word ‘I’ when one is writing in the style of a first-person account? Sheesh!

I'm not going to tag anyone with it so go now & have a nice weekend, peasent!

31 comments:

Sarclover said...

Waaaahhhhhhhhh!!!

have to go back and dig out those LOTR Trilogies now...

dang!

and the hell is a meme can somebody just bloody tell me already!!!!

9 said...

u sound impressed. good.. now get back to ur sentry duty, knight!

(i hv no bloody idea wat the hell is too. i'm just quoting from everyone).

Leen Ash Burn said...

If you're left only with one Knight, shouldn't it be Knight rather than Knights?

:-)

anisism said...

i didn't read. =)

A Babe Of Very Little Brain said...

cerita yang sunggoh boring (especially after you replaced the word 'blowjob' with somethingorudder).

*yawn*

chics said...

no i didn't have a blast weekend :(

Sports Freak said...

I have to agree with babe...

an orc giving a "blowjob" to a "robot" unleashing the "random" "power" would have made it much more exciting.. :)

Anyway, well written.

9 said...

leen:
FYI, 1 'Company' has 62 to 190 soldiers.

anis: drop and give me 20!

9 said...

babe:
oi, this is a PG webpage.

chics:
so sorry to hear that. anything for me to kiss to make 'whatever' better? hihihi. oops, PG webpage! PG webpage!

*nain smacks himself*

sports freak:
dude, i'm kinda worried about you... 'an orc giving a blowjob'?

Cosmic_GurL said...

Hahahahah...Perasan! Tak aci lah coz u replaced the words!

Desparil said...

i give it 3.5 out of 5. tolak 1 point for not using bj and 0.5 point for screaming "Elendil" instead of "For Arwen", "For Middle Earth", "For Frodo", "Legolas is a fag" or "Roma Victor!".

9 said...

cosmic gurl:
mana nk cari robot in Middle Earth?

deparil:
ceh! kena tolak point for not using 'BJ'. PG! PG!

A Babe Of Very Little Brain said...

what's PG? p***ek gatal?

kepala_angin said...

no army of frogs to give you sustenance eh.. hmmm..

anisism said...

eh i actually have that top.

depan printed: personal trainer
belakang printed: drop and give me 20

have you been stalkin me here?

la femme écrivain said...

i hate memes.
i get so pening reading them.

but of course,thats just me.

9 said...

babe:
'parental guidance' la.

hihi, but my mum is wont to say, 'p****t mengenyam'.

KA:
there was but we were waiting for the debes and whatevernots u lot eat at that restaurant of yours.

9 said...

anis:
alamak, kantoiii!

la femme:
if u know wats a meme, go and explain it to sarc. i hv no idea..

la femme écrivain said...

memes and these tagging games are one and the same la kan?

hehe whatever.

Desparil said...

The term "meme" ([miːm] in the IPA; rhymes with "theme"), derived from the Greek word mimema, "something imitated" often refers to a piece of information passed from one mind to another. The term first came into popular use with the publication of the book The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins in 1976, and the conceptual framework of memes borrows from the study of genes -- the units of biological transmission. Historically, the notion of a unit of social evolution, and a similar term (from Greek mneme, 'memory'), first appeared in 1904 in a work by the German evolutionary biologist Richard Semon: Die Mnemische Empfindungen in ihren Beziehungen zu den Originalenempfindungen, translated into English in 1921 as The Mneme.

By analogy with genetics, a meme passes from generation to generation via family and cultural traditions or training rather than via sexual reproduction, with occasional "mutations." Another common usage of the term "meme" relates closely to academic study of folklore and the informal communication of cultural information, in which memes fit into an analogy of "language as a virus".

9 said...

la femme:
see there u go. i hope des' exhaustive explanation satisfies you.

des:
tak boleh panjang lagi ke? :l

KaiserSoze said...

Hehhe..that was a good one. I love the fantasy genre and if you ever decide to write one of them, do let me know eh? (i want an autographed copy of course)..;)

Leen Ash Burn said...

oh pardon my kebodohan.

anisism said...

now YOU drop and gimme 20!

la femme écrivain said...

err..
des,thank you?

Desparil said...

9,

cukup la tu. panjang sangat kang.. tak syok pulak. eh, what am i talking about here?

Desparil said...

la femme,

you're welcome... cewah.. macam blog sendiri la pulak.. jangan marah ah mr 9?

9 said...

kaiser soze:
ait. i'll personally sign it,"to my adoring fan, kaiser. revel in my brilliance - 9"

leen:
takpe. saya maapkan awak. :p

9 said...

anis:
hehehe, drop what? ;)

des: takpe, takpe.. peminat punya pasal.

Desparil said...

9,

woih, aku dah tag hang..

anisism said...

hahahahahahahahahahhahaha. spank yeeewww!!